recalling

I've been reading again the infamous (un)Luuuuurve thread that Rich started a year and a half ago, where I discussed some love problems I'd been having. That's when someone called me 'asshole' for the first time (well, that might not be the first time, but it was the first time someone did it related to my love problem).

Actually, I called myself an asshole and some post later that guy named Fleder (I know, I know, it's not his real name, but that's how I met him) said this: 'Do you mean a small sentence like: "You're an asshole"? :P ', and then everyone started what became some kind of tradition (Even Rich said a couple of months ago 'Is Carlos aware of your association with the word "asshole"? ;P ').

Anyway, I hadn't felt in that way for a while and I thought I was "getting better", but I just discovered that wasn't the case. I'm feeling like that right now, not for the same reasons as before since I haven't had the chance to become someone else best friend nor loosing my self-esteem just for trying to be with someone, but for hoping that things would be different at some point... I can "proudly" say again "I'm such an asshole"

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